Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

15 Dec 2011

Grief is...

It can be a dull ache in my arms, a tightening of my rib cage that doesn't let me breathe, a sharp pain in my heart. When my fingertips go cold and sweaty and a sudden lightheadedness makes me take a seat, it is called grief. Grief, at times, is physical. And there is no pill for that. It exists and I can't pretend otherwise. I don't love it and I don't hate it, I simply live it. And it's not as bad to me as it sounds to you.

On the contrary, I find this physical grief is what makes me feel alive and see the beauty in the world. Sometimes people ask me when am I going to live again, that I should try to move on. Move on from where? Live what? If I didn't live, I'd be with my daughter, and I am not, so I live. Grief makes sure that I am acutely aware of being alive and of the time's passing. I never stopped living. My life changed and now I live a new life, but that doesn't mean I don't live.

The key to grief is accepting life for the lessons it brings.

Love & Light

1 comment:

  1. My darling, your words are so wise and somehow calming. I feel your strength, the one a mother has to protect and look after her little ones. It seems you can take care of the whole world. I love you. I'm so proud of you (in the right sense of the word). You were always a wonder woman, now you are a wonder mother. My words cannot reflect the depth and wisdom of your character. Sending you love!