I wrote this as we took a few minutes to catch our breath outside the venue...
The conference has drawn to a close and everyone went home. Here we are,
standing by the entrance, the last ones to leave. A family next to us
pulls up in their car and a family of three emerge: father, mother, and
daughter. My heart pulls a little (actually, a lot), thinking that this
is what should've been, could've been. It will never be and it hurts.
And then there comes Guilt. She says, you have a son, how dare you feel
this sadness and wish for your daughter! Would your son be here if she
I dislike Mrs. Guilt very much...
Then I look over to the side and see my daughter in her Mimi-doll,
sitting quietly in my son's stroller, one model-year newer yet the same
as hers would have been, and I realise: I do have a daughter. And I have
a son. This will always be. Not the three of us, but the four. And I am
now OK with it.
This is something I owe to every person who was in the room at the
conference this weekend: participants, presenters, volunteers, and
organisers. What a beautiful event it was. Filled with tears, laughter,
hugs, and understanding nods and glances. Lots of tissues were used,
lots of tea and coffee drank. I also feel that a lot was learned by
everyone, a lot was shared. So much support and love for each other. I
hope new connections were made that will turn into much needed support
and eventually into friendships that will last a lifetime.
It was a beautiful gathering of truly amazing people.
Thank you to everyone for making it possible.