This morning, while eating pancakes on our sunny balcony, we realised our neighbours have a baby. They are in the building across from us and there it was, a baby on their laps. About five or six months old... Does it mean they conceived when we were already grieving? I can't even do the math right now.
WHY? Why does everyone else seem to have a baby while I'm pregnant again? There are no guarantees Wiggles will be ok, so it's not like I feel that I'll soon have a baby. I'm just watching everyone while hoping for my own without any real plans for it.
I hate this. I feel like screaming: This is my SECOND. I'm supposed to be experiencing all that you have for much longer than you, yet I'm still waiting. And planning on what we'll do in case Wiggles dies too...